One True Friend

"True friendship multiplies the good in life and divides its evil.... 

To find one true friend in a lifetime is good fortune; 

to keep [her] is a blessing." (Baltasar Gracian) 

Days 21-24--Have you found one true friend in life? I have. But to be honest, I think the friendship "found" me. 

Thirty-two tears ago, Bas and I moved from Boston to Wheaton. About the same time, Sue Anderson and her husband, Gordon, also moved to Wheaton from the East Coast. The following year our sons, Matt and Luke, were in a class together at the local elementary school in our neighborhood.

Through our sons' friendship, which remains close even today, I met Sue. We learned that we grew up in Dutch communities 30 miles from each other. We learned we were both graduates of Calvin College. We learned we both love to read, to visit art galleries, to attend concerts. Sue taught me about friendship, about loyalty, and about perseverance. 

For 32 years Sue and I have shared our lives. When we lived in Wheaton, we went to art exhibits together, explored gardens together, read books together. On our birthdays, we gave each other cross necklaces from around the world, tea things with tulip motifs, gifts wrapped in paper designed by Judy Buswell, and, of course, books.

When I first became Ill with a debilitating immune-system illness, Sue came to my house, sat on the other end of my couch, and gave me a Chicago Tribune article about a woman who had the same illness. It was a gamechanger for me to read the story of someone who was experiencing the same debilitation. The article listed contact information for a support group that even today is a lifeline for me. 

When Alisa and I were couch-bound for years with the illness, Sue came to our house nearly every day. She would let herself in the back door and holler, "Yoo-hoo!"  She brought us books from the library. She did errands for us. She taped more than 100 episodes of Little House on the Prairie for Alisa. She and Gordon took Matt with them to activities I was too sick to attend. She became a second mother to our children.

Yesterday Sue, Gordon, Bas, and I had lunch at Cantigny Gardens in Wheaton. While walking through the flower gardens, Sue told me that Gordon had proposed marriage to her under an apple tree in the garden. We found an apple tree, and Gordon got on his knees and said, "I would ask you to marry me all over again." Sue answered, "I will!"

Over the decades, Sue and I have remained true friends, even though we now live 2000 miles away from each other. 

In Gracian's words, Sue has "multiplied the good in my life." 

To keep her is a blessing.